Scripture

Romans 2:1 (English Standard Version)

Therefore you have no excuse, O man, every one of you who judges. For in passing judgment on another you condemn yourself, because you, the judge, practice the very same things.

Consider

Gossip is not a modern phenomenon. Researchers have even suggested there is an evolutionary advantage in sharing information about those in our social circles. People who are most observant, so the reasoning goes, amass details about who in the tribe is trustworthy, desirable, has valuable resources, or poses a threat. Collecting and sharing information about members of a community can therefore avert danger, keep people from misbehaving, and enhance social bonding (Allure, 2008).

Regardless of whether this thesis is valid, no one would deny that gossip can also be quite harmful. Over 57 times the Bible directly warns against the dangers of gossiping. In fact, Proverbs 6 names gossip among the seven things that God hates, including murder, arrogance, and plotting wickedness against a brother or sister.

If we don’t want to be guilty of gossip that harms, we need to understand what it is and how we can avoid it.

Webster’s dictionary defines gossip as the habitual practice of revealing personal and sensational facts about others. These “facts” can take one of three forms:

• Lies. Arguably the worst form of gossip is telling outright lies about another person.
• Half-Truths. Even if the information we share is partially true, we deceive by leaving out vital facts. Telling a half-truth is the same as telling a half-lie and manipulates others by misleading them.
• Truths. This is the tricky one. We can tell the absolute, whole truth about someone and it still qualifies as gossip. Why? Because our motives are selfish. We often share information as a way of solidifying our status with others as the person “in the know.” Francis Bacon once observed that knowledge is power, and insider information is powerful indeed.

Sometimes we have legitimate reasons for sharing information we’ve learned about someone else. For example, in sharing a prayer request with a group, how can we guard against gossip and speak only in love and an earnest desire to help? In such cases you can test your motives by asking discerning questions:

• Who will benefit if I share this information?
• Am I certain of my facts?
• Do I have this person’s permission to share information?
• Will anyone be worse off if I keep silent?
• Is the timing right for sharing this information?
• Would I want such information shared about me?
• Am I seeking attention for myself by disclosing this information?
• Will sharing this information stir up discord in any way?
  Speak truth in love and not for self-gain.

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Pray

FATHER, help me to be a good steward of information that I receive about others. Guide me in all truth and wisdom so that I may know when to speak, how to speak, and when to keep silent. Expose my pride and my efforts to gain stature with others by sharing information that does not need to be shared. Where I have sinned by gossiping, give me grace and courage to ask forgiveness from those I have injured.

Reflect

Proverbs 26:20;  1 Timothy 5:13

Share

In what context are you most likely to gossip? Why?